Emotions. A lot of it.

I'm already 23 years old. Young to have experienced it all, yes. But old enough to know things even when it doesn't necessarily directly apply to me. 

Blogged: April 7, 2012 

Well, being left alone as to say. Let me tell you a story. I used to have this Vietnamese friend from Sydney, Australia. I met him when I decided I wanted to study French (I still do) and I would be willingly teach that person English/Japanese/Filipino. Well this guy wanted to learn Japanese. He didn't teach me French because he only knows English but he was actually awesome. He's very down to earth, kind, bubbly, sweet, and everything you could ask for. We used to talk everyday, every effing night for let's say 2 years. I actually ended up not teaching him the language at all haha. We talk about the most random stuff. Like, sometimes he would call and not say anything at all. And we're fine with that. Sweet silence. Most of the time he would say sweet things, we listen to his or my playlist and all that but you know, 3 years ago, after that 2 years of consistent communication, it stopped. No warning. I mean, I don't know why but it got me real hard. I guess part of my disappointment is that I expected too much. Who wouldn't, right? But you know, he's not even my boyfriend. I assumed. It was like me not wanting to talk to anyone that time. My friends and family excluded of course. Other guys to be specific. After 2-3 years of no formal communication, we managed to somehow try to reach out again. For me it was a form or closure. An assurance that we still are friends. Once in a while, we text. 

Blogged: November 11, 2012

There are still scattered blogpost about this guy but you know, overtime, I learned to accept. I guess time was really just in our favour and magically fixed everything. We're cool. 

I am going thru the same crisis right now. This is not even the story. But the same thing. A more complicated story actually. As much as possible I don't want this to end because it's beautiful but I guess sometimes things are really meant to end and teach us a lesson. Whatever that is, we'll learn later in life. It's painful now, yes. It's painful even just to think that tomorrow might not be the same anymore. More or less, I think we would know when to let go. We're just really denying it and just trying to deal with the pain well in fact, it's about time. Time to free ourselves of things that once made us happy and sad at the same time. It's complicated. But it's gonna be alright. You know, thinking about what I went thru 3 years ago, I know it's gonna be hard but at the end, it's gonna be okay. Not right ahead but eventually. You shouldn't be in a situation (for too long) where you feel worthless. Ciao!